How To Build A Positive Attitude
During childhood, we form attitudes that last a lifetime. Undoubtedly, it would be easier to acquire a positive attitude during our formative years.If the combination of our inborn temperament and our early childhood experiences have produced a positive attitude. But, if we have acquired a negative attitude, whether by design or by default-are we stuck with it? Of course not. We can change.How do you build and maintain a positive attitude?
- Become aware of the principles that build a positive attitude.
- Desire to be positive.
- Cultivate the discipline and dedication to practice those principles.
As adults, regardless of our environment, education and experience, who is responsible for our attitudes? We are. We have to accept responsibility for our behavior and actions. Some people blame everyone and everything but themselves. It is up to us to choose our attitude every morning.
People with negative attitudes often blame the whole world-their parents, teachers, spouse, bosses, the stars, fate, luck. the economy and the government-for their failures.
You have to get away from the past. Dust yourself off and get back into the mainstream. Put your dreams together and move forward. Thinking of the positive things that are true, honest and good, will put you in a positive state of mind.
If you want to build and maintain a positive attitude, you need to consciously practice the following steps:
Change Focus, Look for the Positive
You need to become a seeker of good. You need to focus on the positive in your life. Start looking for what is right in a person or situation instead of looking for what is wrong. Because of our conditioning, most of us are so attuned to finding fault and looking for what is wrong that we often forget to see the positive picture.
Look for the Gold
Andrew Carnegie came to America from Scotland and as a young boy. He started out by doing odd jobs and ended up as one of the largest steel manufacturers in United States. At one time, he had 43 millionaires working for him. A million dollars is a lot of money today, but in the 1920s it was worth much more.
Someone once asked Mr. Carnegie how he dealt with people. Andrew Carnegie replied, "Dealing with people is a lot like digging for gold: When you go digging for an ounce of gold you have to move tons of dirt, you go looking for the gold."
Andrew Carnegie's reply has a very important message. Though sometimes it may not be apparent there is something positive in every person and every situation. We have to dig deep to look for the positive.
What is your focus? Search for the gold. If you are looking for what is wrong with people or with things, you will find many faults. What are we looking for? Gold or dirt? Even in paradise, fault finders will find faults. Most people find what they are looking for. Looking for the positive does not necessarily mean overlooking faults.
Be an Optimist
Be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind. Talk healthy, happiness, and prosperity to every person you meet. Make all your friends feel that you appreciate their good qualities and strengths. Look at the sunny side of everything. Think only of the best, work only for the best, and expect only the best. Be as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your own. Forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future. Give everyone a smile. Spend so much time improving yourself that you have no time left to criticize others. Be too big for worry and too noble for anger.
Make a Habit of Doing it Now
We have all procrastinated at some time in our lives. I know I have, only to have regretted it later. Procrastination leads to a negative attitude. The habit of procrastination fatigues you more than the effort it takes to do it. If you want to build and maintain a positive attitude, get into the habit of living in the present and doing it now.
When I become a big boy
This is like the little boy who says when he becomes a big boy, he will do this and that and will be happy. And when he becomes a big boy he says that when he finishes college he will be happy. And when he finishes college he says that when he gets his first job he will be happy. And when he gets his first job he says that when he gets married, then he will be happy. And when he gets married he says when the kids get out of school he will be happy. And when the kids get out of school, he says that when he retires, he will be happy. And when he retires, what does he see? He sees life has just gone by in-front of his eyes.
Live in the present
Let's make the best of now and utilize the present to the fullest. The message is not that we don't need to plan for the future. The message is that we do need to plan for the future. If we utilize our present to its fullest, we are sowing the seeds for a better future.
If you want to build a positive attitude, learn "do it now" and stop the habit of procrastination.
Never leave till tomorrow, which you can do today- Benjamin Franklin
When people say, "I will do it one of these days," you can be sure it means none of these days. Some people keep waiting for all the lights to turn green before they leave home. That will never happen. They fail even before they start. Stop procrastinating: Isn't it time that we put off putting things off?
Develop an Attitude of Gratitude
Count your blessings, not your troubles. Take time to smell the roses. Many of our blessings are hidden treasures-count your blessings and not your troubles.
Get into a Continuous Education Program
Intellectual education influences the head and values based education influences the heart. In-fact, education that does not train the heart can be dangerous. If we want to build character in our offices, homes and society, we must achieve a minimum level of moral and ethical literacy. Education that builds fundamental traits of character-such as honesty, compassion, courage, persistence and responsibility-is absolutely essential.
We don't need more academic education; we need more-based education. A person who is morally educated will be a lot better equipped to move up in life or succeed than will a morally bankrupt person, with excellent academic qualification.
In a nutshell, educated persons are those who choose wisely and courageously under any circumstances. If they choose between wisdom over foolishness, good over bad, virtue over vulgarity, regardless of the academic degrees they have, then they are educated.
Education without values
True education is training of both the head and the heart. An uneducated thief may steal from the freight car but an educated one may steal the entire railroad. We need to compete for knowledge and wisdom and not for grades. Knowledge is piling up facts, wisdom is simplifying it. One could have good grades and a degree and still not learn much. The most important thing one can learn is to "Learn to Learn." People confuse education with the ability to memorize facts. Educating the mind without morales creates a maniac in society.
We often are told that knowledge is power. Not really. Knowledge is information. It is potential power and it becomes power only when it is acted upon. Difference between a person who cannot read and a person who can, but does not read?
Learning is a lot like eating. It is not how much you eat that matters, what matters is how much you digest. Knowledge is potential power; wisdom is real power. Education takes many forms; it is not just grades and a degree. It is:
- Cultivating your strength
- Learning self-discipline
- Listening
- Eagerness to learn
Our minds are like muscles, stretch or shrink, it all depends on how much or how little we exercise them.
If you think education is expensive, try ignorance-Derek Bok
Intelligence is quickness to learn. Skill is an ability. Competence is the ability along-with the willingness and desire to apply what is learned. Desire is the attitude that makes a skillful person competent. Many skillful people are incompetent. Ability without the right attitude is wasted.
The first duty of a university is to teach wisdom, not trade; character, not technicalities- Winston Churchill
Build a Positive Self-Esteem
Self-esteem is the way we feel about ourselves. When we feel good within, our performance goes up and our relationships improve both at home and at work. The world look nicer.
Stay Away from Negative Influences
Impressionable minds get influenced by adult behavior and the media. Peer pressure affects not only children and teenagers, it is also prevalent in adults. It shows a lack of self esteem when people do not have the courage to say "No, thank you," and stay away from negative influences.
Negative People
Most people go to their graves, with music still in them. We don't achieve excellence because of our own lack of vision. Whenever people succeed in life, petty people will take cracks at them and try to pull them down. When you refuse to fight petty people, you win. In martial arts, they teach that when someone takes a crack at you, instead of blocking you should step away. Why? Blocking requires energy. Why not use it more productively? Similarly, in order to fight petty people, you have to come down to their level. That is what they want, because now you are one of them.
Don't let negative people drag you down. Remember that a person's character is not only judged by the company they keep but also by the company they avoid
Negative Movies and Television Programs
Today's kids are learning their attitudes and values more from television and movies than from any other source. It is estimated that in the United States, by the time a youngster gets out of high school, he has watched more than 20,000 hours of television, witnessed 15,000 murders, and watched 100,000 alcohol-related commercials. Television programming and advertisements convey the message that drinking is fun, smoking is glamorous, and drugs are the "in" thing. No wonder the crime rate is so high!
Soap operas and other television shows as well as movies glamorize premarital and extramarital sex. No wonder commitments are lacking in relationships and divorce rates are high. Impressionable viewers set their standards and benchmarks based on what they see and hear in the media. And no matter who we are, we are all impressionable to varying degrees.
Profanity
Using profanities show a lack of vocabulary, self-control, and discipline.
Rock Music
The lyrics of some hit songs are obscene. The music we hear and the performances we watch can subconsciously influence us.
Learn to like the things that need to be done
Start by doing what is necessary, then what is possible, and suddenly you are doing the impossible- St. Francis of Assisi
Some things needs to be done whether we like them or not; for example, mothers caring for their young's. This may not always be fun, and may even be painful. But if we learn to like the task, the impossible become possible.
Start Your Day with Something Positive
Read or listen to something positive first thing in the morning. After a good night's sleep we are relaxed and our subconscious is receptive. It sets the tone for the day, and puts us in the right frame of mind to make the day a positive day. In order to bring about change, we need to make a conscious effort and be committed to make positive thoughts and behavior part of our lives. Practice having positive thoughts and behavior daily until they become a habit.
If you are going to change your life, you need to start immediately.-William James
You may be disappointed if you fail, but you will be doomed if you don't try-Beverly Sills
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